A Reprieve

The dream has taken on a more comforting quality. It’s monotonous, and much more human than the cruelty of before. I can lock my emotions in the depths of my heart and leave my mind to be theirs. I still love Julia, and that was comforting, and I can thus stand to be near her in the waking world, in our secret haven. I need her now, too, to remind me to be unorthodox, because in my dream my spirit is entirely broken, and it rubs off on my life. It’s difficult. I have to use doublethink to think my way out of doublethink. It’s like my life awake is a mirror image of my life in dreams, so that one is the other reversed.